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Banned
#101 Old 7th Nov 2011 at 4:43 AM
While I would never completely ban a race from dating me, I can say I typically don't date Hispanic men. I have a lot of Hispanic friends - but I don't find myself attracted to Hispanics. Am I racist? To me, no. To you, maybe. But if I met someone who is Hispanic but went with all my standards, I most certainly wouldn't mind dating him. And I'm sure the reason I don't typically date Hispanic men is because of the fact that *most* Hispanics in San Antonio are slightly ghetto. I said "most" not "all". I have nothing wrong with them.
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Banned
#102 Old 21st Nov 2011 at 11:26 PM
It's a preference just like hair color.
Banned
#103 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 12:18 AM
Is it homophobic to not want to date someone because of their sexuality?

No. No for that, and no for this.
Theorist
#104 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 12:19 AM
Well, except for that whole part of people never being enslaved because of the color of their hair, or beaten to death, or marginalized in society, I guess race is exactly like a hair color.

EDIT: And if you're just saying you prefer blondes like you prefer Indian men, then I'm not completely sold that it's exactly racist - but it's still very strange to ignore the significance of race by equating it with something that people really don't seem to beat each other up about.
Banned
#105 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 3:28 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
Well, except for that whole part of people never being enslaved because of the color of their hair, or beaten to death, or marginalized in society, I guess race is exactly like a hair color.
Gays have been discriminated against PLENTY, and obviously a straight man doesn't want to date a gay man.
Theorist
#106 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 4:16 AM
Quote: Originally posted by 5M0K3
Gays have been discriminated against PLENTY, and obviously a straight man doesn't want to date a gay man.

AAaaand if you'll check my post time and yours, you'll be quite welcome to note that you came in just moments before mine apparently, I wasn't talking to you, and you can be pleased that I was talking about hair color = race and not anything remotely resembling sexuality.

But thanks for getting your knickers in a bunch over a ninja'd post. I'm always happy to have criticism leveled at me for a post I never saw.
Banned
#107 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 4:22 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
AAaaand if you'll check my post time and yours, you'll be quite welcome to note that you came in just moments before mine apparently, I wasn't talking to you, and you can be pleased that I was talking about hair color = race and not anything remotely resembling sexuality.

But thanks for getting your knickers in a bunch over a ninja'd post. I'm always happy to have criticism leveled at me for a post I never saw.
I know you weren't talking to me. But I have the right to say whatever the hell I want. I don't know where you come from, but I come from America, and here, there's a thing called The First Amendment.

Just because different races - practically ALL races, INCLUDING Caucasians - have been discriminated against, that doesn't mean you're a racist. Hitler thought the "perfect" race was blonde hair/blue eyes, so if someone prefers blondes with blue eyes, are they automatically a Nazi? Maybe we should pelt them with stones because they have a preference, just like everyone else?
Instructor
#108 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 5:03 AM
Actually, hitler thought the perfect race was a person of German Teutonic origin aka Master Race Aryan of Nordic Descent. It was the nordic blood. Blondes with blue eyes are seen in all the caucasian races, and some of the non-caucasian races too in small numbers.
Banned
#109 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 5:25 AM
Quote: Originally posted by SimsLover50
Actually, hitler thought the perfect race was a person of German Teutonic origin aka Master Race Aryan of Nordic Descent. It was the nordic blood. Blondes with blue eyes are seen in all the caucasian races, and some of the non-caucasian races too in small numbers.
I've never seen a non-Caucasian with natural blonde hair, and I've rarely seen non-Caucasians with blue eyes. I suppose I should've pointed that out, that it wasn't JUST blonde hair/blue eyes. Thank you.
Forum Resident
#110 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 5:28 AM
Racism is simply hating someone because of their race, and race alone. So it's pretty well in the context of the word itself. I don't believe you'd hate someone just because you're not attracted to them physically.

Plus, people aren't aware, but physical attraction is all science. Especially when it comes to men, preferences just tend to come from experience, and one's surroundings. You have to be willing to take into consideration that not every country is a racial melting pot like say the US. Some only have on race, or skin color, and thus they use other reasons to make preferences. Like social class, religion, and location. My husband is white and blonde, and admits he'd never willing date white and blonde girls, because there was such an abundance of them in his hometown they bore him. So he tended to be attracted to foreign women since they were rare, in his eyes, and different. This situation could work the other way as well, it just honestly depends on the person.

Otherwise, when it comes down to the nitty gritty, most people would be more likely to set aside race, or skin color for other more important things, like a big butt on a woman, or a freckles on a man. In the end however, this concept brings it all back to race, since a big butt on a woman is by social standards more commonly seen on Black or Hispanic women, and freckles on men are seen much more commonly on Caucasian men.

So, in short, no it has nothing to do with race, it's just easy to assume it does.

We were all put on this Earth to procreate, had God intended to make us all look the same today, we would have all looked the same to begin with. So mingle peoples. Plus, we all know mixed babies are the prettiest babies. Mine's proof.

; D
world renowned whogivesafuckologist
retired moderator
#111 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 5:34 PM


If you cannot post without being rude, then do not post. This is your warning - ignore this message at your own peril.
Banned
#112 Old 22nd Nov 2011 at 5:50 PM
Quote: Originally posted by HystericalParoxysm


If you cannot post without being rude, then do not post. This is your warning - ignore this message at your own peril.
Was that directed at me or someone else? If it was directed at me, then sorry.
Banned
#113 Old 7th Jan 2012 at 7:11 AM
No its not its all on your taste. I dont date any black girl and never plan to. Its just that i dont show any taste toward black woman. No not racist
Scholar
#114 Old 8th Jan 2012 at 10:30 PM
I think it is a preference. How many people want someone who is fat, skinny, blonde, brunette, tall,short etc. These might be shallow preferences, but we do base a good chunk of our partners on their looks. If these are the only criteria you use in picking a partner it is probably not the best thing, *BUT* that is another topic entirely.

CC4Sims
Love will humiliate you and hate will cradle you.
Jealousy would be far less torturous if we understood that love is a passion entirely unrelated to our merits.
Mad Poster
#115 Old 9th Jan 2012 at 12:07 AM
If you have a preference based on race, that's no one else's business. It's your own personal preference. If someone doesn't like it, they don't have to. It doesn't necessarily mean you hate people of other races; it simply means you'd rather be with the race you prefer.
Scholar
#116 Old 12th Feb 2012 at 6:39 AM
To each his own. This decision should be made by you, reguardless of what others say.
Instructor
#117 Old 13th Feb 2012 at 8:59 PM
When you prejudge what you would do before hand, you are being prejudiced. Until you've met every single person of <insert race>, how would you know how you would never be attracted?

To me a preference is something you favor. But it is not concrete, or exclusive. A person may prefer Hispanic partners, but still date other races. Saying you would not date a black man or woman is not a preference. Prefer means to 'favor' or 'hold above another.' If you absolutely will never date anyone who is black, that is not a preference.
Scholar
#118 Old 13th Feb 2012 at 10:43 PM
Quote: Originally posted by SimsLover50
When you prejudge what you would do before hand, you are being prejudiced. Until you've met every single person of <insert race>, how would you know how you would never be attracted?

To me a preference is something you favor. But it is not concrete, or exclusive. A person may prefer Hispanic partners, but still date other races. Saying you would not date a black man or woman is not a preference. Prefer means to 'favor' or 'hold above another.' If you absolutely will never date anyone who is black, that is not a preference.


I will repeat something I said earlier, that I think it's best to be open to the possibility of dating people outside of your race because superficial characteristics are not a good basis for a relationship, to preface my comment, so that people don't mistakenly jump on me, thinking I'm a racist.

I think you are relying purely on semantics here. Some people talk about what kinds of food they like as their preferences, and they "strongly prefer" not to eat certain things. If starving, a person who strongly prefers not to eat asparagus, would probably eat it. If incredibly lonely, a person who strongly prefers not to date a person of another race might do so. But, under normal circumstances, those people will not pursue the things they strongly prefer not to. These can be considered preferences, or if you don't like the word preferences because you can't see beyond its dictionary definition, these examples can at least be considered morally equal, so long as there is no underlying opinion of the superiority/inferiority of another race. Sometimes skin color just happens to be a physical characteristic that people have strong preferences about, just like how some people prefer blondes, brunettes, or redheads. It is possible for people to form preferences based on purely superficial characteristics.

Again, I do not think that purely superficial characteristics are a good basis upon which to choose one's partner, but sexual attraction is an important part of a romantic relationship and, if a person's attractiveness to a particular person relies partly on skin tone, it doesn't make that person a bad person.
Test Subject
#119 Old 13th Feb 2012 at 10:54 PM
I'm white and I've never dated anyone who's black. That being said, I live in a town that is vastly white - we're talking two or three black families compared to several hundred white families. Same goes for other races, such as Asian. It's just an issue of me not knowing many people of other races. I wouldn't be opposed to dating someone of another race, as long as I was romantically attracted to them. I don't think of interracial dating as being taboo. As long as two people are happy in a relationship, I don't care and I don't think anyone else has a right to protest that either, whether the couple is of opposite races, genders, religions, or anything else. It's nobody's business!
Instructor
#120 Old 14th Feb 2012 at 2:13 AM Last edited by SimsLover50 : 14th Feb 2012 at 4:19 AM.
Quote: Originally posted by Oaktree

I think you are relying purely on semantics here. Some people talk about what kinds of food they like as their preferences, and they "strongly prefer" not to eat certain things. If starving, a person who strongly prefers not to eat asparagus, would probably eat it. If incredibly lonely, a person who strongly prefers not to date a person of another race might do so. .


Maybe, however it is tough to see people dismiss an entire cultural group as undatable because of a pigment tone, especially if they've never dated someone of that ethnicity, also there is usually a wide range of looks and skin colors in each individual racial group.

I do think it is important to examine to some degree the origins of preferences, and whether it can be honestly called that, or whether it is simply a lack of familiarity. They aren't the same thing. For instance, as a child I might not have been exposed to certain foods and thus I might not choose to eat them or might be reluctant to try something new because of a fear it would taste bad or because of unfamiliarity. As an adult, I've learned that new stuff/ foods can sometimes be good. So hmm... Lack of exposure and lack of experience with something you've never done before... Hmm. Is not the same as being not attracted to it.


Quote: Originally posted by Oaktree
but sexual attraction is an important part of a romantic relationship and, if a person's attractiveness to a particular person relies partly on skin tone, it doesn't make that person a bad person.


I agree. We aren't entirely in control of the things we like or are attracted to, and without being in a person's head it is tough to determine a person's motivation for anything. But I don't honestly think I could ever say I could NEVER do something. Because there are always exceptions to every rule. And as one ages, tastes can mature and change and things like skin tone, ethnicity and appearence matter less.

In general, I do agree with you it is best to keep your options open, and not limit yourself by superficial traits. Looks are fleeting, but Love can last forever.
Scholar
#121 Old 14th Feb 2012 at 2:46 AM
I can see how some people would make that kind of snap judgment based on a lack of experience with others of another race. And that would be foolish. And I wasn't defending everyone who has a racial preference in partners. I know that some people who have a racial preference are racists. But I thought it was important to point out that that sort of preference should be judged on a case-by-case basis. Some people have bad reasons for preferring not to date a particular race, but some people simply have a preference, which can't be helped.
Field Researcher
#122 Old 14th Feb 2012 at 9:03 AM
Quote: Originally posted by 5M0K3
I've never seen a non-Caucasian with natural blonde hair, and I've rarely seen non-Caucasians with blue eyes. I suppose I should've pointed that out, that it wasn't JUST blonde hair/blue eyes. Thank you.


Really? Where I live this is quite common. In my town there are a lot of interracial relationships. I am convinced that all the interracial breeding is why we have some of the most beautiful women in the world!

Having said that I have not dated anyone of a different race, simply because I have not met anyone that I am romantically interested in.

I have friends of different races and they are great, but I would not date them. I think cultural differences matter more than color of your skin because we even have two distinct White cultures not to mention the different Black cultures and the Cape Colored's (that is what they call themselves) and the various Asian cultures.

It is great to have friends from different cultures because that way you learn that there are more ways of doing things and seeing the world than your own. I do think that it is more difficult in a romantic relationship simply because your assumptions and references are not always the same even if you think they are.
That said, mixed couples do work and I see no problem with that. When my daughter is old enough to date I wouldn't dream of telling her who to date! It is an entirely personal thing.
Instructor
#123 Old 14th Feb 2012 at 1:36 PM
racĀ·ism noun
1. a belief or doctrine that inherent differences among the various human races determine cultural or individual achievement, usually involving the idea that one's own race is superior and has the right to rule others.
2. a policy, system of government, etc., based upon or fostering such a doctrine; discrimination.
3. hatred or intolerance of another race or other races.


____

I do think it's wrong to say to someone "Oh. Well I like you as a person but we can't date because I don't date *insert race* people." It would definitely seem racist to the person on the receiving end of that statement but it isn't always racist.
I'm not physically attracted to anyone that isn't white. Not any particular race, just anyone who doesn't have light colored skin. As SimsLover said though, there are different skin tones among even darker races. I would probably date someone that was a "lighter-toned" or mixed Black/Hispanic/etc. if I found them attractive and liked their personality.
I've had friends of all races that I am/was very close to but I was never physically attracted to any of them because white is my preference.
It doesn't mean I'm racist. I don't think I'm superior because I'm white or think that anyone else is inferior because they're not. If I thought I was better than these people, then I would be racist.
And yeah. Personality matters more to me. I'm not shallow and I'm definitely not all that great looking myself. But I'm not going to date someone I don't find attractive.
Lab Assistant
#124 Old 14th Feb 2012 at 8:47 PM Last edited by Darthreven77 : 14th Feb 2012 at 8:48 PM. Reason: typo
agree with StardustX completely.
I prefer women who are White, Asian, and Indian but to me that is just appearance-based. Race wont stop me from dating someone I like as a person. Though to some appearance is a lot (not to me) but it is only part of the equation.
Theorist
#125 Old 15th Feb 2012 at 12:23 AM
Quote: Originally posted by StardustX
[i]I do think it's wrong to say to someone "Oh. Well I like you as a person but we can't date because I don't date *insert race* people." It would definitely seem racist to the person on the receiving end of that statement but it isn't always racist.

But isn't that enough reason to not ever say such a thing? Just because you have never dated an overweight person, does that give you the right to tell another person "No thanks, I don't date fat chicks?" Correcting hateful speech is almost as important as correcting hateful thoughts and behaviors. If something is abusive and/or could be perceived as painting yourself as a racist, or really just any sort of shallow person in general, then should you say it unless your intent is to be abusive and/or appear racist? Unless it's absolutely explicit that you're not racist, should you ever do something that might make you appear racist? Racism is pretty ugly, absolutely socially inappropriate stuff - when it is okay to play around with language in a way, or take actions that might lead people to believe you're racist?

It's wrong to judge people on the color of their skin, but humans are going to judge people - words and deeds don't seem particularly inappropriate metrics, not dating someone and then explicitly stating you don't date them because of their skin color... how could that not lead people to start thinking of someone as a racist?
 
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