Hi there! You are currently browsing as a guest. Why not create an account? Then you get less ads, can thank creators, post feedback, keep a list of your favourites, and more!
Lab Assistant
#301 Old 20th Jun 2015 at 10:35 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
It's okay to think someONE is ugly, but it's racist to think ALL PEOPLE OF A CERTAIN RACE ARE AUTOMATICALLY UGLY to you. It's based on a stereotype. As for my own personal preferences, "Not crazy, not stupid, and would also want to date me" isn't particularly a definite sort of physical type I think. I've dated tall women and short women, the crazy ones and the stupid ones and an awful lot that thought they were smarter than me, thin women and obese women, dark skinned, pale-like-milk girls, asian, black, white, Republican, Democrat, Communist, Anarchist, violent, dog lovers, cat ladies... whatever. Trust me, a woman's not prettier than any other woman because of how she looks but how she carries herself, how she feels about herself, and how well the two of us get along. Even my porn is pretty egalitarian. Women are all lovely, each in their own way, maybe not for me personally but for someone somewhere. I don't limit myself and I don't think it's healthy for anyone else to limit themselves either.

Frankly, the notion of dating a person because they remind you of someone else is creepy as fuck to me.


Couldn't have said it better.
Advertisement
Instructor
#302 Old 20th Jun 2015 at 10:47 PM
I wanna throw by two cents in:
1) I don't see how it's racist not to date someone based on their skin colour. I can see it being considered shallow, since skin colour is physical, not mental. Everyone has their "things" and turn on/offs based on skin colour doesn't seem much stranger than any other physical attractions/repulsions.

2)
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
Frankly, the notion of dating a person because they remind you of someone else is creepy as fuck to me.


May I direct you to the new bane of your existence...?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oedipus_complex
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Electra_complex
Theorist
#303 Old 24th Jun 2015 at 3:23 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Nillson
Why cant race be a turn on or turn off?


Saying that race itself is a turn on or turn off is making an assumption that everyone of that race is the same. I think that by itself is the very definition of prejudice and lumping people into a stereotype.

Say someone finds dark skin, wide noses, and voluptuous lips to be a turn-on. There are many black people who may fit that description, but it would be stereotyping to lump all black people into that description as there are many who have medium to light skin, narrow noses, and thin lips.

Although I identify with my race, I prefer to be judged as an individual, as I think most people do.

Resident wet blanket.
Test Subject
#304 Old 25th Jun 2015 at 4:22 PM
In my opinion, it's simply a preference. For example, I'd rarely be physically attracted to a blonde guy, because I simply prefer other haircolours. It's just a superficial preference. http://physweeklypoc.com/wp-content...1.467257181.png .
Test Subject
#305 Old 27th Jun 2015 at 2:01 PM
Quote: Originally posted by McChoclatey
I've heard so many people say, "I only date Black girls," or "I only date White girls." But would that be considered racist or a preference? Can skin color be a preference?


No it's not racist because some black people(most) have different physical features and voices and stuff
Theorist
#306 Old 27th Jun 2015 at 11:39 PM
White people also have different physical features and voices and stuff, like everyone does.
Theorist
#307 Old 28th Jun 2015 at 4:45 PM
Lab Assistant
#308 Old 1st Aug 2015 at 12:59 AM
Dear MrChocolatey
I preferred to date and now am married to a person of a different race. I always felt way way more attracted to that race (African people) in general, I like their food better, I like their music better I loved it all. so I married him !.,. Interestingly enough, my youngest son, (out of 5) was always attracted to Asian culture, since age of about 3 years old. He was obsessed with reading about Samurai and dreamed of going to Japan. He learned to cook Asian food, He learned to speak Japanese and made himself many Asian friends. He dated some Asian girls and now is married to one.
It is not always that we prefer to date in our own culture , some times we prefer another!
My son says it is from his past life, Perhaps so.
:lovestruc :lovestruc :lovestruc :lovestruc


Quote: Originally posted by McChoclatey
Interesting answers...thanks for your opinions, everyone. For the record, I don't have anything against anyone for not wanting to date someone of a specific race. They can date whoever they want to date. I hold no anger against them. But I was wondering this a while back and I couldn't figure it out. It's possible that someone wants to date someone who is of their own race because they feel more comfortable; they have more in common with them. It's possible that certain traits people of different races most often carry may be deemed unattractive by someone, and that's okay. I was thinking that anyone of any race can be attractive, but now, to me, it depends on the person for what they find the most attractive and who they find the most beauty in. Not everyone thinks in the same way; I forgot that. I wasn't thinking this debate topic thoroughly, and now, I've delved too much into this--sorry if I came off as nosy. I was curious.
Test Subject
#309 Old 8th Aug 2015 at 6:37 AM
Most of the individuals suggesting that racial preference isn't racist are uneducated factually. Biologically, most of our genetic variation in DNA is individual variation. Homogeneous countries like Japan and South Korea have similar looking individuals due to how individuals in those countries developed environmentally through the ages.

We are in the third era in our geological timescale, and the formation of our 7 continents began in the Proterozoic time. The environment has impacted "racial features" for ages now. Most of the racial differences we see today are due to how persons are impacted environmentally, and how their ancestors were impacted through history.

Race itself only exists in a sociological way. It does no exist in a biological way. That is not a hippie statement or an opinion. Biologically, we as humans are still only one species. For race to be relevant in the way we naively use the term, race would have to be relative to genetics that show we're excessively different. There is a mere 15 to 20 percent of our DNA that can be traced back to a specific group. That's not near enough to ascribe humans based on external and internal characteristics. There is an overwhelming amount of genetic material in squirrels and chimpanzees that separate us from them, but not human beings. When there is that much genetic material to distinguish species is when race becomes relevant. There is more similarity between Europeans and sub-Saharan Africans than there is Africans and Melanesians--the ones that share similar external characteristics. Humans are genetically variegated,and where we are placed impact us tremendously.

It's incredibly racist to say you don't like one race over the other: for race has no strong difference. Racial characteristics have developed environmentally through time. Why do you think African-Americans have lighter skin than Africans? Are you simply going to believe the common flawed argument that it's all due to them having a bit more white blood in them? America has a completely different environmental and political priority than Africa.

It seems small now, but that is because we're in this era. There was a small specifies of humans that emerged during the dinosaur age, and I'm sure they wouldn't be considered the white people in this era even if they did have the same characteristics whites did by our sociological standard. They'd look excessively different in formation.

That is a prime example of how we've constructed race. We've given labels to certain groups of people based on how they look. Genetics in themselves do not support our social ignorance.

Racism is considering one race superior over the other. Considering the fact genetics are individually variegated in our DNA, to say you don't date "black people" is simply saying you don't date people that have the social label negro.

You could list the features you dislike in an individual, and considering the formation of our continents you could even say you dislike individuals in certain parts of that country--since environment does impact our appearance. To say you dislike a sociological group though is the definition of racist.
Top Secret Researcher
#310 Old 8th Aug 2015 at 6:16 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Kommode
That is a prime example of how we've constructed race. We've given labels to certain groups of people based on how they look.


*coughRachelDolezalcough*

ETA: probably should clarify that I was agreeing with you, and that she's a fine example of the point.

My MTS writing group, The Story Board
Theorist
#311 Old 9th Aug 2015 at 5:08 AM
I must say I prefer the term ethnicity over race, which I only use the sports version.

The gorgeous Tina (TS3) and here loving family available for download here.
Scholar
#312 Old 9th Aug 2015 at 12:11 PM
Quote: Originally posted by McChoclatey
I've heard so many people say, "I only date Black girls," or "I only date White girls." But would that be considered racist or a preference? Can skin color be a preference?


Old post, and I apologize if I'm repeating, but I only read the first few pages... I would say that the thread's title vs. what you're actually asking opened the door for all the attraction/sexual preference interpretations. To me, if people say they only date Black girls/White girls, they don't care about the wide diversity of skin tones/eye color or hair color that exists within both of those groups. So, it would seem their criteria for their choice is not driven by appearance, but something else. That "something else" is very likely to be assumptions on how the person from the avoided group would behave, interact etc. Assumptions based on race = stereotyping, stereotyping = racist.
Scholar
#313 Old 14th Aug 2015 at 1:55 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Periandre
Old post, and I apologize if I'm repeating, but I only read the first few pages... I would say that the thread's title vs. what you're actually asking opened the door for all the attraction/sexual preference interpretations. To me, if people say they only date Black girls/White girls, they don't care about the wide diversity of skin tones/eye color or hair color that exists within both of those groups. So, it would seem their criteria for their choice is not driven by appearance, but something else. That "something else" is very likely to be assumptions on how the person from the avoided group would behave, interact etc. Assumptions based on race = stereotyping, stereotyping = racist.


I don't agree with this at all. It is comparable to stating your preference for brown haired girls or women with big breasts. Whether it is racist (or about prejudice in the other examples) depends on the motivation behind it. I don't see it as racist if its an aesthetic reason anyway. And it also doesn't automatically mean they won't care about the diversity of skin tones. It is just faster in saying it like that instead of coming up with a long lecture about your specific requirements of which specific brown tone. And ofc you have people who just don't know their own taste really and just think they like that more :p

Anyway, the motivation behind that expression can be anything, and without context you just can't tell which motivation. In this case I would argue that you are the prejudiced one.

EDIT : As for using aesthetics as major reason for dating someone, well, stupid ppl etc :p
Scholar
#314 Old 15th Aug 2015 at 4:23 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Periandre
Old post, and I apologize if I'm repeating, but I only read the first few pages... I would say that the thread's title vs. what you're actually asking opened the door for all the attraction/sexual preference interpretations. To me, if people say they only date Black girls/White girls, they don't care about the wide diversity of skin tones/eye color or hair color that exists within both of those groups. So, it would seem their criteria for their choice is not driven by appearance, but something else. That "something else" is very likely to be assumptions on how the person from the avoided group would behave, interact etc. Assumptions based on race = stereotyping, stereotyping = racist.


The underlined is an assumption from you. Not a logical conclusion. You are the one here putting motivation behind the person that is not you.

I think you are confusing discrimination and racism. It is only racism if the motivation is based on superiority by being prejudiced about a race. While discrimination is just setting a group using a common characteristic (in this case colour). I never heard anyone who likes blondes say that blondes are superior to brunettes. Because it is not the same. The expression 'I only date coloured women' can be just about finding them more attractive (or at least thinking they are). That doesnt have to be the same as finding them superior. It could be, but you can't tell when taken out of context like that.

Sure if the motivation behind the expression is about superiority, or like some cultural prejudice, then it is racism. But it could just as well be a very shallow expression, just about sexual preference. Like saying I only date white blond girls with big boobs. Preferably called Greta.

Ugh, it is like what happened these days to one of our dutch newspapers. One of its headlines went over the world. American newspapers outraged because the headline was racist because the N word was used. Conveniently ignoring what the article was about (a book review) and the fact that it was used with '' , showing that it was a quotation. It is just no use to take expressions out of context and try to guess motivation behind it. The motivation is what matters, not the expression.
Scholar
#315 Old 19th Aug 2015 at 1:52 PM
That disagree button is a very compelling argument.
Lab Assistant
#316 Old 29th Jul 2016 at 11:45 PM
Personally speaking it's hurt my feelings in the past when a person I've had a crush is not interested in me solely because I have a dark skin complexion. Nevermind my personality or my educational success and this or that. What you are saying when you tell me "I don't date black girls" is that I do not matter because my skin is not attractive. That nothing about who I am as an individual is relevant but my black skin.

That is racism.

Quote: Originally posted by mithrak_nl
That disagree button is a very compelling argument.


I really hate the 'disagree' button in terms of the debate threads. It's so passive aggressive. Rather than state your claim you just hit disagree to dissuade someone else's argument. It's an invalid form of passive aggressiveness.

"It all takes time"
Theorist
#317 Old 30th Jul 2016 at 4:49 AM
And you can use both for the price of one! I guess people can't handle discussions, other opinions or the truth in general, making it more easy to hit disagree as it is anonymous for regular members. In my case, getting used to it, because my opinions aren't always very popular.

The gorgeous Tina (TS3) and here loving family available for download here.
Lab Assistant
#318 Old 30th Jul 2016 at 5:46 AM
It's racist if you say you won't date someone because of their skin, or if you say you would never date anyone of *insert race here*. But if you say "I'm typically not attracted to stereotypical facial features of *insert race*" then i think that's different. You're leaving it up to the possibility of falling for someone you wouldn't typically be attracted to. Personally I am not attracted to the stereotypical features of african americans, probably because there's too much overlap in our genetics aside from skin color lol. But I don't say I'll never date someone with those features, cause I don't know how life will turn out. It all depends on how you word it imo.
Scholar
#319 Old 30th Jul 2016 at 6:15 AM
Honestly I think there are times where it is because of racism, but I also believe there are times when it isn't because of racism. I'm sure there are some people out there that will never date people with a certain skin tone not because they are racist, but maybe because they know someone that is and just wouldn't want a partner of a certain skin tone because they're afraid the racist person they know would cause problems. For example let's say one or both of your parents was a racist, and you were the type of person that really wants your parents to approve of who you date. Would you date someone that your parents would potentially hate just because of their skin color? If I was that sort of person that needed my parents' approval I'm not sure I would, because it could just lead to potential problems.

Personally I think it's wrong to turn someone down just because of their skin color. People need to be able to look beyond a person's skin color and see the actual person.
Lab Assistant
#320 Old 30th Jul 2016 at 6:16 AM
Quote: Originally posted by deadhead_kay
It's racist if you say you won't date someone because of their skin, or if you say you would never date anyone of *insert race here*. But if you say "I'm typically not attracted to stereotypical facial features of *insert race*" then i think that's different. You're leaving it up to the possibility of falling for someone you wouldn't typically be attracted to. Personally I am not attracted to the stereotypical features of african americans, probably because there's too much overlap in our genetics aside from skin color lol. But I don't say I'll never date someone with those features, cause I don't know how life will turn out. It all depends on how you word it imo.


You also have to remember that there's no set facial feature for any particular race. For example, people say African Americans have wide flat noses. Me and all of my siblings have sharp noses that are not flat in any form. Black people can also have thin lips, different eye colors, etc. It all comes down to genetics.

"It all takes time"
Lab Assistant
#321 Old 2nd Aug 2016 at 7:25 PM
I think I posted on this years ago.

I'm going to say that, yes, it is racist. Because what aren't you attracted to? Melanin? Please don't give the whole 'physical features' bit because no feature is exclusive to a "race". Perhaps more common of people in a certain geographical area but not exclusive.
Not to mention how there is only one race of humans....can you guess?

Been downloading like crazy...so many great creators here! Neglecting forums...will be back soon...ish.
Instructor
#322 Old 11th Aug 2016 at 6:04 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Lawli-Lawli
I think I posted on this years ago.

I'm going to say that, yes, it is racist. Because what aren't you attracted to? Melanin? Please don't give the whole 'physical features' bit because no feature is exclusive to a "race". Perhaps more common of people in a certain geographical area but not exclusive.
Not to mention how there is only one race of humans....can you guess?



How about this? I'll date someone I find at least somewhat attractive and who has complementary personality traits to mine.

If I happen not to find an entire ethnicity attractive, I'm sorry, but I can't change my attractions. If you consider that racist, good for you (you apparently believe in direct doxastic voluntarism). If you don't, even better (you understand that direct doxastic voluntarism is bull).

It's like how a person who isn't attracted to elderly people shouldn't be classified at ageist.
Test Subject
#323 Old 16th Aug 2016 at 3:46 AM
I think it's personal preference, just like eye colour or hair colour.
Theorist
#324 Old 16th Aug 2016 at 11:06 PM
Quote: Originally posted by dreamprisoner
I think it's personal preference, just like eye colour or hair colour.


A preference isn't exclusionary like the OP is talking about. You don't go "I prefer blonde hair. You're perfect in every other way, but since you don't have blonde hair I'm not going to date you." That's not a preference, that's an exclusion.
Forum Resident
#325 Old 4th Sep 2016 at 12:25 AM
I think it's preference. Calling someone racist for having a certain preference is dumb IMO. It's like calling cis people who don't date trans people transphobic...

The simmer formerly known as Averex
My Claim to Fame
 
Page 13 of 15
Back to top