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Lab Assistant
#251 Old 28th Nov 2014 at 3:18 AM
Quote: Originally posted by frenchyxo22
I agree with you.

One thing I will NOT do is talk bad about whichever race of men Im not attracted to.
Especially a male from my own race.


I agree, I don't like using stereotypes as insults or talking bad about someone because of their race, it's unfair and rude. I would talk bad about them if they had an abousutley horrid personality, though.
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Lab Assistant
#252 Old 28th Nov 2014 at 3:21 AM
Another thing; it's kind of like saying you only like blonde girls for example. No one would call you a raging racist for saying "I have a thing for blonde girls, brunette aren't my type.". It's a preference, and I'm sure our guy/girl who prefers blondes wouldn't outright turn down a brunette.
Theorist
#253 Old 28th Nov 2014 at 4:05 AM
Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
Another thing; it's kind of like saying you only like blonde girls for example. No one would call you a raging racist for saying "I have a thing for blonde girls, brunette aren't my type.". It's a preference, and I'm sure our guy/girl who prefers blondes wouldn't outright turn down a brunette.


I think it's pretty clear that "only liking blonde girls" is pretty pathetically shallow too, and also based on a myriad number of false premises and stereotypes.
Instructor
#254 Old 28th Nov 2014 at 4:35 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
You're just either presuming that literally no male of that "race" could ever be attractive to you, or pushing whatever negative traits you associate with what doesn't get you going onto an enormous group of people without knowing them based on your stereotype. Billions of people.



Im not "presuming" anything.
What do males of the Banana and Apple race being or not being attracted to me have anything to do with me if im only attracted to Grapes and Oranges? Nothing.
I have a preference and I have every right to, no?
So what exactly is your point here? Nothings based on stereotypes, just experience and my personal choice.
Who are you anyways to know what my preferences are based on?

Peace, Harmony & Balance... Libra is Love..
Lab Assistant
#255 Old 29th Nov 2014 at 11:48 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
I think it's pretty clear that "only liking blonde girls" is pretty pathetically shallow too, and also based on a myriad number of false premises and stereotypes.


I agree that's it's shallow, I and I don't endorse in discriminating against who I date/don't date, I'm just acknowledging some stereotypes.
Theorist
#256 Old 29th Nov 2014 at 9:32 PM
Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
I agree that's it's shallow, I and I don't endorse in discriminating against who I date/don't date, I'm just acknowledging some stereotypes.

"I don't date people of a certain:" is generally based on stereotyping, and stereotyping that involves race is racism. Is it KKK racism? Absolutely not. But it is racist, and just waving it off and trying to rationalize it is just another thing people do when they don't want to acknowledge that they're not perfect people or that something that they didn't think was wrong was incorrect. Racist isn't something you are or aren't, like a boolean switch you flip on or off, it's something people do. And often as not, it's things that people do without even thinking about them, or even wondering if they could possibly be wrong. Stereotyping is a wonderful, useful thing our brains do sometimes to allow us to make sense of the world around us, but we've got to do our best to acknowledge that stereotypes are not the complete picture of....anything.

Believe it or not, there's more than a billion women on the planet I've never dated or even considered dating. It's difficult to imagine over here sometimes too. Do I have preferences? Sure, but I'd hope for everyone's own sakes that they're aware at least that preferences should never be hard rules. I've certainly met enough people who other people probably tried to imagine were confined to a stereotype that were nothing like that stereotype to understand that while not exactly meaningless, it's worth paying attention to each person as an individual rather than writing them off as a whole based on generalities. That's nothing about discrimination because racism isn't all about "discrimination" in terms of denying someone a job or calling them derogatory names. You don't have wear a white hood and burn crosses in people's lawns to do racist things, large or small. In fact, I imagine what's holding back race relations in a lot of the world has very little to do with overt racism, or even acknowledged racism. It's just normal people thinking they're doing normal things and those normal things involved unconscious or unacknowledged stereotyping all adding up over time as tiny amounts of discrimination into an avalanche of segregation and bad blood between people.
Lab Assistant
#257 Old 1st Dec 2014 at 12:29 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
"I don't date people of a certain:" is generally based on stereotyping, and stereotyping that involves race is racism. Is it KKK racism? Absolutely not. But it is racist, and just waving it off and trying to rationalize it is just another thing people do when they don't want to acknowledge that they're not perfect people or that something that they didn't think was wrong was incorrect. Racist isn't something you are or aren't, like a boolean switch you flip on or off, it's something people do. And often as not, it's things that people do without even thinking about them, or even wondering if they could possibly be wrong. Stereotyping is a wonderful, useful thing our brains do sometimes to allow us to make sense of the world around us, but we've got to do our best to acknowledge that stereotypes are not the complete picture of....anything.

Believe it or not, there's more than a billion women on the planet I've never dated or even considered dating. It's difficult to imagine over here sometimes too. Do I have preferences? Sure, but I'd hope for everyone's own sakes that they're aware at least that preferences should never be hard rules. I've certainly met enough people who other people probably tried to imagine were confined to a stereotype that were nothing like that stereotype to understand that while not exactly meaningless, it's worth paying attention to each person as an individual rather than writing them off as a whole based on generalities. That's nothing about discrimination because racism isn't all about "discrimination" in terms of denying someone a job or calling them derogatory names. You don't have wear a white hood and burn crosses in people's lawns to do racist things, large or small. In fact, I imagine what's holding back race relations in a lot of the world has very little to do with overt racism, or even acknowledged racism. It's just normal people thinking they're doing normal things and those normal things involved unconscious or unacknowledged stereotyping all adding up over time as tiny amounts of discrimination into an avalanche of segregation and bad blood between people.


I do admit that it's rude to turn someone down based of their race and such, but as I said everyone has their preferences. I do get that stereotyping is a bad thing, and I generally try not to do it. Just because I mentioned stereotypes doesn't mean I'm stereotyping. I understand that sometimes someone looks at an Asian guy eating sushi and thinks something rude. I get that people look at white girls drinking Starbucks and think how basic they are.

But you have to admit, if you see someone you're interested in dating, you're in dating them for a reason. Perhaps their personality plays into it, but looks play a big part as well. Racial preferences are a real thing, and you can't except everyone to want to date everyone, no matter how they look. Maybe this person you're interested in dating has green eyes and an oval shaped face. Perhaps your ex partner had similar features, because thats the type of facial feature that interest you.
Lab Assistant
#258 Old 1st Dec 2014 at 12:33 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
I think it's pretty clear that "only liking blonde girls" is pretty pathetically shallow too, and also based on a myriad number of false premises and stereotypes.


By the way, I was being extreme in my examples, and unrealistic to get points across. Don't take my example seriously, because they are unrealistic in every way.
Theorist
#259 Old 1st Dec 2014 at 12:48 AM
Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
But you have to admit, if you see someone you're interested in dating, you're in dating them for a reason. Perhaps their personality plays into it, but looks play a big part as well.

It's okay to think someONE is ugly, but it's racist to think ALL PEOPLE OF A CERTAIN RACE ARE AUTOMATICALLY UGLY to you. It's based on a stereotype. As for my own personal preferences, "Not crazy, not stupid, and would also want to date me" isn't particularly a definite sort of physical type I think. I've dated tall women and short women, the crazy ones and the stupid ones and an awful lot that thought they were smarter than me, thin women and obese women, dark skinned, pale-like-milk girls, asian, black, white, Republican, Democrat, Communist, Anarchist, violent, dog lovers, cat ladies... whatever. Trust me, a woman's not prettier than any other woman because of how she looks but how she carries herself, how she feels about herself, and how well the two of us get along. Even my porn is pretty egalitarian. Women are all lovely, each in their own way, maybe not for me personally but for someone somewhere. I don't limit myself and I don't think it's healthy for anyone else to limit themselves either.

Frankly, the notion of dating a person because they remind you of someone else is creepy as fuck to me. Why don't you just put a picture out of the actual person and fap to it, it would probably lead to a lot less headaches.

Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
Racial preferences are a real thing,


Sure they are. So is the KKK and cholera. Just because something's real doesn't mean it's something that's good for you or good for society. Just because you're doing something doesn't mean it's the right thing for you to do, even if you nominally don't think of yourself as doing something wrong.
Lab Assistant
#260 Old 1st Dec 2014 at 1:15 AM
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
It's okay to think someONE is ugly, but it's racist to think ALL PEOPLE OF A CERTAIN RACE ARE AUTOMATICALLY UGLY to you. It's based on a stereotype. As for my own personal preferences, "Not crazy, not stupid, and would also want to date me" isn't particularly a definite sort of physical type I think. I've dated tall women and short women, the crazy ones and the stupid ones and an awful lot that thought they were smarter than me, thin women and obese women, dark skinned, pale-like-milk girls, asian, black, white, Republican, Democrat, Communist, Anarchist, violent, dog lovers, cat ladies... whatever. Trust me, a woman's not prettier than any other woman because of how she looks but how she carries herself, how she feels about herself, and how well the two of us get along. Even my porn is pretty egalitarian. Women are all lovely, each in their own way, maybe not for me personally but for someone somewhere. I don't limit myself and I don't think it's healthy for anyone else to limit themselves either.

Frankly, the notion of dating a person because they remind you of someone else is creepy as fuck to me. Why don't you just put a picture out of the actual person and fap to it, it would probably lead to a lot less headaches.

Sure they are. So is the KKK and cholera. Just because something's real doesn't mean it's something that's good for you or good for society. Just because you're doing something doesn't mean it's the right thing for you to do, even if you nominally don't think of yourself as doing something wrong.


Okay, let's get one thing clear; I did not say I thought all people of a certain race are automatically ugly. I merely said, racial preferences are a real thing. That does not mean that someone dates only Indian people (for example) and no one else. It only means they like how that set of skin tone, hair colour and feature looks together. I also don't like the notion of only dating one race. I do admit that it is weird and strange to only date one type of person, but if you ask me, thats the case with a lot of people. Seems to me you're very open-minded. There is actually a study on how girls date men that look like their fathers, so, people who are all similar, check it out: http://www.livescience.com/1611-wom...er-men-dad.html My good friend has dated a total of three people, and they were all relatively similar. Brown hair, freckles, had a confident personality. I found it strange, but it was clearly her preference. I never said I thought racial preferences were a good thing, by the way, but I'm sure everyone leans slightly towards one race, and don't even notice.
Instructor
#261 Old 4th Dec 2014 at 3:22 AM
There are people who have preferences, then there are those who have no preferences.

Neither side is right to tell the other, their personal choice is wrong. Okay?
Who are we to judge?
Feel free to only date Asians if you like, you are also free to date all kinds of people and watch egalitarian pornos.

Bottom Line is to each their own.

Peace, Harmony & Balance... Libra is Love..
Theorist
#262 Old 4th Dec 2014 at 5:31 AM
Quote: Originally posted by frenchyxo22
Neither side is right to tell the other, their personal choice is wrong.


There is always right and wrong in the Debate Room, even if interpreting miniscule degrees of right or wrong. If everyone just wanted to chime in with their personal opinions without someone weighing in on things, I'd hope they'd have the common sense to stay out of here.

Who cares what anyone's opinions are if you can't back them up? If you can't support why you think a certain way, then why do you think that way? If you're so wholly irrational as to have no internal logic, or self-awareness, or if you're blinded by willfully ignoring defects in your character, then how does that ever allow you to improve? If you feel strongly enough about something to participate in a Debate about it, then shouldn't you have a reason? And if you don't feel strongly about something, then why are you participating here of all places. There's plenty of room in General Discussion for lazy thinking and cat pictures.

Not having a reason for an opinion is as good as not having an opinion at all. You might as well shit your pants or not shit your pants, it's just an automatic function of your body and you've put absolutely piss all thought into it. There's room for pants-shitting opinions. I like green. I do not care for purple. It's not a question of debate on the merits of these things. I will not challenge someone who brings a rational discussion on why green is a terrible color, with actual examples and/or logic and/or math. That's not a debate. That's a preference.
Instructor
#263 Old 4th Dec 2014 at 7:22 PM
Yes this is a debate......... By all means debate away and you are entitled to agree/disagree with people's opinions and state why. Still, not directly speaking to you, during a debate one shouldn't try to force their beliefs and opinions on others just because they think a certain way or choose to make the choices they do.

Peace, Harmony & Balance... Libra is Love..
Alchemist
#264 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 2:43 AM
Quote: Originally posted by frenchyxo22
Yes this is a debate......... By all means debate away and you are entitled to agree/disagree with people's opinions and state why. Still, not directly speaking to you, during a debate one shouldn't try to force their beliefs and opinions on others just because they think a certain way or choose to make the choices they do.


There's a difference between challenging an opinion and forcing one's opinion on another. Mistermook might be a bit emotional about it, but he makes a point of questioning people's opinions, which they themselves have volunteered for scrutiny via posting in The Debate Room. That is what the Debate Room is for. He isn't telling people what to think, he's asking them why they think that, as well as supplementing his own opinion, which in this case happens to be on the opposite side of the spectrum. If a person can't handle having their opinions questioned, then they should find a corner of the forums that is not about explicitly calling opinions into question.
Off-Topic Discussion is where those who aren't prepared to explain themselves should go to share their opinions.

"The more you know, the sadder you get."~ Stephen Colbert
"I'm not going to censor myself to comfort your ignorance." ~ Jon Stewart
Versigtig, ek's nog steeds fokken giftig
Instructor
#265 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 4:47 AM
Like I said........
I was making a general statement...not talking to him directly, of course you should know that since you quoted me.

Peace, Harmony & Balance... Libra is Love..
Test Subject
#266 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 5:04 AM Last edited by o0bubby : 12th Dec 2014 at 5:32 AM.
Quote: Originally posted by Mistermook
"I don't date people of a certain:" is generally based on stereotyping, and stereotyping that involves race is racism. Is it KKK racism? Absolutely not. But it is racist, and just waving it off and trying to rationalize it is just another thing people do when they don't want to acknowledge that they're not perfect people or that something that they didn't think was wrong was incorrect. Racist isn't something you are or aren't, like a boolean switch you flip on or off, it's something people do. And often as not, it's things that people do without even thinking about them, or even wondering if they could possibly be wrong. Stereotyping is a wonderful, useful thing our brains do sometimes to allow us to make sense of the world around us, but we've got to do our best to acknowledge that stereotypes are not the complete picture of....anything.

Believe it or not, there's more than a billion women on the planet I've never dated or even considered dating. It's difficult to imagine over here sometimes too. Do I have preferences? Sure, but I'd hope for everyone's own sakes that they're aware at least that preferences should never be hard rules. I've certainly met enough people who other people probably tried to imagine were confined to a stereotype that were nothing like that stereotype to understand that while not exactly meaningless, it's worth paying attention to each person as an individual rather than writing them off as a whole based on generalities. That's nothing about discrimination because racism isn't all about "discrimination" in terms of denying someone a job or calling them derogatory names. You don't have wear a white hood and burn crosses in people's lawns to do racist things, large or small. In fact, I imagine what's holding back race relations in a lot of the world has very little to do with overt racism, or even acknowledged racism. It's just normal people thinking they're doing normal things and those normal things involved unconscious or unacknowledged stereotyping all adding up over time as tiny amounts of discrimination into an avalanche of segregation and bad blood between people.


im sorry i only believe about 2 sentences from this the rest... everyone can have an opinion and im not going to argue ! for the original question no it is not wrong to have a race you like more or find more attractive but speaking your choice to others can be racist they could be offended easily and whether we like it or not people have choices so there is nothing we can do about it we cant tell them its wrong. and what works for some people may not work for others.
Theorist
#267 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 5:53 AM
Quote: Originally posted by o0bubby
everyone can have an opinion and im not going to argue !

Then you're in the wrong forum, because "debate" is not about "having an opinion" it's about the conversation about your opinion, supporting your opinion.

If you don't know what a debate is, you should refrain from attempting to engage in one. Posting here means your opinions may be challenged, argued over, and so forth.
Alchemist
#268 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 7:02 AM
Quote: Originally posted by frenchyxo22
Like I said........
I was making a general statement...not talking to him directly, of course you should know that since you quoted me.


I do know that. And I replied to you, because you made the general statement, and I mentioned Mistermook because he seems to be the unnamed target of your post. All clarified now?

"The more you know, the sadder you get."~ Stephen Colbert
"I'm not going to censor myself to comfort your ignorance." ~ Jon Stewart
Versigtig, ek's nog steeds fokken giftig
Instructor
#269 Old 12th Dec 2014 at 3:29 PM
Quote: Originally posted by SuicidiaParasidia
I do know that. And I replied to you, because you made the general statement, and I mentioned Mistermook because he seems to be the unnamed target of your post. All clarified now?


yes sir!

Peace, Harmony & Balance... Libra is Love..
Scholar
#270 Old 13th Dec 2014 at 9:45 AM
I had a friend in school who pretty much told me to fuck off and die because I told him I liked him and I suggested that maybe some day we could start going out. His reason?

Quote:
"I only date Puerto Rican girls (he's Puerto Rican.) I ain't going to pollute my bloodline and disgrace my family with the likes of some white bitch.


Ever since then, when I encounter someone who says they won't date someone of a certain race or has a preference for people of one race and won't give anyone else of another race the time of day, I tell them to fuck right off. My future children will be taught that looks don't matter and sometimes the person they prefer the looks of isn't the person they need when it comes to the emotional and spiritual side of the relationship.

The secret ingredient is phone.
Growing up means watching my heroes turn human in front of me.
Thank you, O Mighty Doom Deity! - BL00DIEHELL
Lab Assistant
#272 Old 13th Dec 2014 at 5:51 PM
Quote: Originally posted by Kaiko Espurr Mikkusu
Except there are a LOT of asian blondes and even asian whiteheaded girls. Mostly dye jobs, but i'm sure some blondes do have an asian grandparent.
http://th01.deviantart.net/fs38/300..._by_pii_kun.jpg
Same for other races.


I never mentioned anything about races, I just said blondes in my example. As in, all blonde people. I wasn't just talking about one race.
Theorist
#273 Old 13th Dec 2014 at 11:43 PM
Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
I never mentioned anything about races, I just said blondes in my example. As in, all blonde people. I wasn't just talking about one race.

...

You're in a thread that's explicitly about race and racism. In general, when someone isn't being disingenuous in that sort of set up I think it's pretty clear that if you say "blonde people" or "people with big noses" you're at least also talking about race unless you're so far off the rails in the discussion that you should probably pack things up and head home. If you want to separate yourself from the discussion of race, then don't participate in the discussion on race, or don't try to pretend everyone's got the wrong idea.

It's like the "everyone's entitled to their opinion" nonsense. It's not the Opinion Room. The OP dictated the topic, you're presumably participating in that conversation by showing up here.
Top Secret Researcher
#274 Old 14th Dec 2014 at 5:11 PM
Quote: Originally posted by quesadildos
I never mentioned anything about races, I just said blondes in my example. As in, all blonde people. I wasn't just talking about one race.


There's a pretty big difference between hair color and skin color. Last I checked, people weren't enslaved, killed en-mass, or put in concentration camps because of their hair color.

That being said, I don't think a preference for a certain color is necessarily racist, because races aren't delineated by color. I like pale skin. That covers some Caucasians, some Hispanics, some Asians, and a small minority of black people. I dislike darker skin, which covers some Caucasians, some Hispanics, some Asians, and probably more black people than is good for my dating choices.

When you say "I don't like [race] because they don't fit my preferred skin color or I don't like their facial features," that's rather ignorant, to say the least. I've seen Caucasians who are darker than some African Americans. If you refuse to date dark-skinned people, but you're okay dating a dark-skinned Caucasian over a light-skinned non-Caucasian, then there's clearly something wrong.

Point is, skin color has little to do with race. If you're disregarding an entire race because of it, then I would say that's racist.
Theorist
#275 Old 14th Dec 2014 at 8:40 PM Last edited by Mistermook : 14th Dec 2014 at 9:41 PM. Reason: Stupid autocorrect
Right, and that's because humans vary less in their genetics across the entire spectrum of humanity than nearly any other animal. However it happened, all the variation in humans died out about 70,000 years ago. What we're left with isn't much - some variation in some amazingly superficial surface characteristics and a handful of other differences that no one's likely to be noticing but your doctor, and even then only if you're pretty damned ill. Considering how mobile and frisky we all are, it's amazing that there's even that differentiation left. Humans aren't like other animals stuck in seasonal ruts, migrations, or attendant on particular food sources. Basically for tens of thousands of years everyone's grand-ancestors have made complete sluts of themselves, fornicating with every new face in town one way or another. There's no reason not to, because all of our success-states for mating have nearly zero to do with appearance. Except for "I totally don't like to sleep with people with open sores, or mysterious rashes," there's no support for a reasonable limitation on mating in humans based on appearances. The color of your skin doesn't dictate the health of your children, or how well you might support those children, or whether your genitals will fit together with someone with a different skin color. These days appearances don't even have all that much to do with genetics at all - because Joan Rivers as she went out was not the Joan Rivers that came out. With enough effort, you can pretty much become the person you imagine yourself to be and not the person your genetics designed you to be.
 
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