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Instructor
Original Poster
#1 Old 16th Mar 2014 at 11:38 PM
Default Is racial fetishizing ever OK?
I'm posing this question because I'm an Asian girl who is exposed to it on a very regular basis. Not only am I subjected to it, but I see a lot of others that are. You'd be surprised how many "FIND AN ASIAN WIFE TODAY!" ads that are out there. It's easy to shake it off once, but when it becomes a pattern I feel the need to bring it up?
I've talked about it before, and have gotten a wide variety of responses. There's one group of people that agree with me wholeheartedly, but there's also a great many that say its harmless, as long as you remain 'respectful' about it. I'm seeing fetishism of Asian women, black women, and Latinas everywhere, and it's alarming how many men are looking up race specific pornography nowadays.

So my question is: can "racial preferences" ever be done respectfully? And where is the line drawn between 'preference' and fetishizing?
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#2 Old 16th Mar 2014 at 11:45 PM
"And where is the line drawn between 'preference' and fetishizing?"

I think it's the difference between "I like asian women because I find them especially attractive" and "I like asian women because they're subservient, delicate little china dolls" (of course I'm not saying that myself - but I've seen it come up before as things said to asian women in a discussion like this). It's fine to have a particular type that gets your motor running, but another to assume that someone's racial background will automatically mean they act, dress, or behave in a certain way, or have particular interests, or anything other than affects what they look like.

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Instructor
#3 Old 17th Mar 2014 at 2:27 AM
I have to agree with HP on this.

I think the thing about Racial fetishizing though is the idea of playing upon stereotypes made of the races in question where as racial prefrence would be the tendency to be romantically involved more with one racial group. Now is racial fetishizing wrong? I can honestly say I would be on the fence about it, because in all honesty, it's your choice, not mine. I am not one to go around telling people what they want to do in bed is wrong. As long as these people know that this isn't how all people of that race act, dress or behave, who would I be to judge or deem wrong?

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Alchemist
#4 Old 17th Mar 2014 at 10:47 PM
i think it has less to do with race and more to do with being female.
females of all colors, shapes, sizes, ages, and images are made into fetishes. you just might notice what fetishes pertain to you more than you'd notice what fetishes pertain to the rest of us. hell, a woman who just wears glasses is a fetish. no really, thats the only thing that makes her special to that specific demographic.

im light skinned, light eyed, and light haired. is there a fetish for that? yep.
all of it has its roots in the one-dimensional way the world views women. try not to take it too personally.

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Instructor
Original Poster
#5 Old 17th Mar 2014 at 11:13 PM
Quote: Originally posted by SuicidiaParasidia
i think it has less to do with race and more to do with being female.
females of all colors, shapes, sizes, ages, and images are made into fetishes. you just might notice what fetishes pertain to you more than you'd notice what fetishes pertain to the rest of us. hell, a woman who just wears glasses is a fetish. no really, thats the only thing that makes her special to that specific demographic.

im light skinned, light eyed, and light haired. is there a fetish for that? yep.
all of it has its roots in the one-dimensional way the world views women. try not to take it too personally.

That's a great point, but it's also worth noting that privilege is intersectional, meaning that racism and sexism are two separate issues ((which sometimes intertwine, causing situations like these)) Misogyny is a huge problem, but there are definitely some issues that effect women of color exclusively.
Instructor
#6 Old 18th Mar 2014 at 9:10 AM
Ribbonista, what you are slightly implying is that no other man aside from white men fetishize other races outside of their own. Racial fetishizing isn't exclusive to just one race nor do I believe it would be exclusive to just men/Heterosexuals. anyone can fetishize a race or type of person and I don't believe that this issue affects just women of colour, but that it is more common that you see women of colour getting fetishized.

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Instructor
Original Poster
#7 Old 18th Mar 2014 at 11:42 AM
Quote: Originally posted by levini
Ribbonista, what you are slightly implying is that no other man aside from white men fetishize other races outside of their own. Racial fetishizing isn't exclusive to just one race nor do I believe it would be exclusive to just men/Heterosexuals. anyone can fetishize a race or type of person and I don't believe that this issue affects just women of colour, but that it is more common that you see women of colour getting fetishized.

Oh, I'm sorry, I probably didn't word that correctly. I meant within the circle of women's issues, if that makes sense? Racial fetishizing can be done by any member of any race, and it's an equally big problem no matter the circumstances, I'm sorry if I was unclear.
Theorist
#8 Old 19th Apr 2014 at 8:11 AM
If you mean things like THIS then hell no, it's not okay. More like racism with a string tied to a stick that is holding up a box.
Mad Poster
#9 Old 27th Apr 2014 at 9:58 PM
This question reminds me a little of that thread 'Is It Racist to Not to Want to Date Someone Because of Their Skin Color'. Sort of the flip side of that. I personally don't think it's ok to see someone's racial type as the most important thing about them, the thing that makes them appealing or non-appealing. People who seek relationships on this basis probably get what they deserve.
I just heard this story on NPR - Snap Judgment - Seeking Asian Female
 
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